my secret heart
by nealandkel4eva
Summary: update hopefully coming soon, sorry its been so longbasically, it's a kelNeal story that starts with them hanging out together. rated pg13 just in case.i never know what i'm going to writesecond chapter is up.
1. the truth

**Disclaimer: Okay people, I don't own Kel or Neal, they belong to Tamora Pierce. **

Kel laughed softly as Neal tickled her. He loved to torture her; it was his favorite pastime. Her thoughts turned to her feelings for him and she felt her stomach jolt. She wished he felt the same way about her. Her eyes met his and he smiled; she loved that smile. They were so close; she wanted to kiss him but was afraid. Her fear must have shown because he gripped her shoulder.

"What's wrong Kel?" He asked kindly.

"I can't do this Neal." She whispered, pulling away from him. "It's too hard."

"Can't do what? What's going on Kel?" He grabbed her hand and sudden warmth flooded her. "Tell me what's bothering you." She stared at the floor, shaking uncontrollably as she felt his fingers touch her chin. He lifted it gently and stared into her eyes. What he saw behind those hazel orbs surprised him. As deep feeling of love resided there, burning as bright as the stars. "Oh." She looked down again as tears filled her eyes.

"Promise me this won't change anything between us, that we'll still be friends."

"I can't do that Kel. Everything changes now." Her head came up faster this time and he wiped away her tears with his handkerchief. She was hurt by his words, not knowing what he truly meant.

"We can't be friends?" He nodded and moved closer, putting his lips to hers in what could only be called a kiss. She pulled away suddenly, touching her lips in surprise before it dawned on her. "Y, y, you, you…" A smile crossed his lips as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "You have feelings for me?"

"Yes." At this she moved in again, not caring if he kissed her until the end of her days.

A/N 

**Sorry it's so short, I'm trying to juggle school and work and all that. Next chapter will be longer. Please review, **


	2. complications

FanFictionFantom: They do make a good couple don't they?

Anjanka: First off, thanx for the review, no matter how strange it was. You reminded me of quite a few things I forgot.

**Disclaimer: I don't really see the point in this, we all know that I don't own these characters, places, and all that. Maybe someday.**

Before I start on chapter two I should probably clear up a few things. This story is supposed to take place during their second year as pages. Everyone is in the same year so that I don't get confused. Sorry if this disappoints anyone. That's all I can think of for now, on with the story!

**Chapter two: Complications**

**-**

She pushed Neal away as soon as she realized what they were doing.

"We can't do this Neal." She whispered. "If Lord Wyldon catches us I'm finished." He sighed heavily as he stroked her arm.

"So that's it then?" He asked hoarsely. "We kiss and we're done?" She felt the pain in his voice and glanced at the open door nervously before cupping his face in her hands. "So the stump wins?"

"I'm sorry. I've been forbidden to have a relationship with anyone. I can't even have my door closed when you guys are in my room." He placed a finger to her lips and she quieted, knowing that everyone could hear her.

"We could hide it; not tell any of our friends." He smiled and grasped her hand. "I don't want to lose you the moment I find out how you feel about me." His eyes traveled to the door before he pulled her into a concealed corner. "Please, give me a chance." Her answer came as a soft kiss, smiling as she stepped away. "Thank you."

"We're going to be late for dinner."

"Let's go before the stump can think of a punishment for us." With that they left her room, happy to be in each other's company.

"Look at this!" Cleon announced as Kel and Neal entered the mess hall. "The rebels have arrived." Lord Wyldon glared at him from the front of the room and cleared his throat, causing silence to fill the hall.

"Cleon of Kennan, Nealan of Queenscove and Keladry of Mindelan, report to me after you've finished your meal." He ordered. "Be seated and eat."

"What put the stump in a grump?" Neal asked as he and Kel joined their friends. Roald shrugged and cut open his potato.

"Probably two pages arriving late and Cleon's mouth." He replied. "What were you two doing that you're ten minutes late anyway?"

"We all know Neal takes forever." Kel replied casually, trying hard not to smile. "I was waiting for him."

"Mithros knows it's true." Faleron interjected, his mouth full of potatoes. Neal glanced up at Kel and read her emotions as best as he could. Her Yamani mask was on and still, it seemed like ever since they kissed he could tell exactly what she was thinking. Seaver had to shake him to break his eyes away from Kel.

"What?" He asked blankly. Kel hid a smile as everyone else looked at him worriedly.

"I asked if you were trying to impress someone." Seaver repeated heatedly.

"Oh, yeah, yeah. One of the court ladies." With that he looked down at his plate, frowning at his vegetables.

"Eat up Neal." Kel insisted lightly. "Am I helping you with mathematics tonight?" he looked up eagerly but his smile disappeared as Merric joined the conversation.

"Can you help me too Kel?" He asked. She sighed and nodded her head, looking down at her plate in exasperation. "Good, cause I really don't understand that catapult problem."

"Whoever needs help come to my room at seven o'clock."

"I will not tolerate tardiness from anyone." Lord Wyldon reprimanded. Kel, Neal and Cleon stood in front of him and Cleon smiled slightly. "Or anyone speaking out of turn, Kennan. The three of you will serve two hours in the armory this Sunday. Queenscove, Kennan, you are dismissed." Neal glanced at Kel before he bowed and left with Cleon.

"Is there anything more My Lord?" Kel asked calmly. Wyldon examined her carefully and crossed his arms over his chest.

"You may remember what I told you when you first came here last year. You are not permitted to have a physical relationship of any sort. Granted you may have feelings for some of the boys, but in no way may you act upon them. Your door will remain open whenever they are with you, as it was before."

"I understand sir."

"Make sure you remember. You will be leaving if I hear anything ot5herwise."

"Yes sir."

"You're dismissed." She bowed slightly and left, wondering how she was ever going to break the bad news to Neal.

She wasn't happy when she entered her room. Her friends looked up from their work for a minute to greet her before staring back at their books. Only Neal noticed that she was very upset.

"Kel can I talk to you?" He asked calmly, glancing around at the others in the room. "Privately?"

"Sure." She replied, gesturing towards the hallway. They walked out of the room and she closed the door. "This isn't fair."

"I knew you were upset. What did the stump want?"

"To remind me that I'm not allowed to be happy. I'll be kicked out if I'm caught having a physical relationship with anyone."

"It figures. I can court any lady in the palace except the one I want." He sighed and pulled her close, holding her tightly to his chest. To any passersby it appeared as a normal hug, but they both knew it was so much more.

**A/N Okay people, that's all I have so far. Send me reviews so that I can keep going. Any ideas are welcome. REVIEW!**


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